Thursday, February 25, 2010

If I Tweeted

I tried to take up Twitter last summer, and really did not enjoy it. I tried to like it and tried to make the most of it for a while, but eventually I just gave it up. I tweet for the magazine I edit at work, but I literally have to set reminders for myself to do it. The main issue, I think, is just that I don’t have much interesting to say that wouldn’t be better said as a Facebook status.

All that said, I occasionally have more interesting days that might be vaguely entertaining as tweets, if I wanted to bother investing more time in that medium. Which I don’t. Yesterday was one of those days, though, since I was on a whirlwind 18-hour business trip, and covering 1000 miles and three states (four if you count one that I flew over but didn’t set foot in) provides a little bit more amusement than the average day.

So here’s what my day would have looked like if I tweeted it (that is, if you could tweet from planes and while driving):

4:00am My alarm is going off. Ugh. I have to be at the airport before I’m usually even out of bed.

5:40 Made it through security within an hour of the time I left home. Impressive, given that I live 60 miles from the airport.

6:30 A flight to Denver is boarding right near me. The line looks like an REI ad.

7:00 A woman ahead of me is ticked about having her purse searched at the gate. "I don't care about rights! I want the people who need checking to be checked!"

8:10 Nice flight. When the heavy clouds break, I can see frosty corn fields in IN or IL!

8:35 I love seeing cities from above when taking off or landing. Chicago has miles and miles of houses with long, skinny yards separated by fences, with detached garages at the back of each lot.

8:45 Enterprise car rental is giving me the Southerner-driving-in-snow upgrade. This thing is a tank!!

9:10 You'd think with all these toll booths, Indiana could afford to fix its potholes.

9:20 Gary Indiana, Gary Indiana, Gary Indiana--that's the town that knew me when!

9:30 45 mph speed limit on an interstate? Are you kidding me? I am unaccustomed to such plodding. (see 5:40)

9:40 I'm starting to get really bored.

9:50 Just saw a sign for 184 miles to Toledo, OH, and entertained myself for a good 30 seconds prounouncing Toledo the American way and the Spanish way, noting the difference in tongue and teeth placement.

10:20 There's a semi in front of me with a long bumper sticker saying "GOD GUTS GUNS [American flag image] NO LIBERALS." I best be going then...

10:50--no, 11:50 EST. Arrived at destination--with 40 minutes to spare!

3:45 Successful lunch meeting. Mission accomplished!

3:15 (Central again now) Ok--the tank seemed unnecessary before, but now with lake effect snow starting to stick, I do in fact feel safer!

4:30 Filling up the rental car near Midway. South side boy in hoopty car hitting on me. Hard to resist.

6:00 Burrito in the crowded Midway food court. Older man asks to share my table and we have a great conversation. Jewish bank consultant with a Catholic wife, tears up when he talks about his "saintly" Catholic mother-in-law.

7:15 Angry family at the gate missed their flight to Orlando and it was somehow Southwest's fault. Father uses his 4-year old son as a guilt trip: "Kyle, come here. [picks him up so is at eye level with airline employee] We're not going to Disney World tomorrow."

8:10 De-icing the wings, then we're on our way!

9:13 Is there anything more beautiful than a million lights glittering on the horizon?

10:30 Oh yeah--there she is, sleeping soundly. Mommy's home.

(now aren't you glad I don't tweet every day?)

3 comments:

tearzamariebaggett said...

no you need to tweet!! i do it! its sooo addictive once you get over the overwhelming feeling of "feeling like you arent doing it right". (which is how i felt the first several weeks). do it, do it, do it!

Amber said...

Hi, just stopped by for the first time. Love your blog. I, too live in a church parsonage. Your little one is a sssuuuppperr cutttiiee!

tearzamariebaggett said...

hey! we could probably do the 6th, Neil works the 13th. just text me and let me know details!

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